LOLx

such a lazy human im~
i admit that im lazy in blogging, thats why i have been stop doing it like ages...

a glimpse of an eye, is already my last sem in the uni life...
thats why i must b back to blog, so people and my love ones could keep in touch with every bits of my life.

so im goin to start back with my birthday post and my son's bday post!!

i'm back :)

beloved people button has something to type on. lolx

things has change alot.
people around changed..
wardrobe changed...
life changed...
style changed...
gadgets changed...
attitude changed....
behaviour changed....
time changed....

just got to realize that frens of mine has changed alot..
on the outside it was still her or him...
but on the inside...there burried an evil spirit of her or him..
maybe is because of their will desire / passion that made them changed..

new sem has just started..
im now in sem2 year3 d...which means im getting nearer to the hectic life of making money..
whenever im still a student, ppl tend to see me standing in the immature circle..
which no single one will perceived that you are a grown up..
i have tried to defend, but still no one understands..
students arent immature please dont underrestimate them.

whereas in the name of love,
i really dont understand this concept that why do men who has girlfrens, still mingle around and cause trouble?

i asked one of my fren, and he told me this..
"whenever men go out and play, they still come home for their wifes, but whenever women go out and play, they will leave with a better man and never come home"
hahahaha....
it sounds kind of true though..

life been boring lately, but sometimes is happening...
anyway it is not in a flow oso..i want it in a flow..
sometimes bored sometimes hectic..can get brain struck u know :(
thats why im blogging now, which u can see the post is not even in a flow..haha
im having brain freeze..sobzz..

here i end with my recent look..and my new eyes. :)




xoxo loves button.

another disappointment.

SERIOUSLY I need to update my blog. ><"
but how to??? with an effing lag line...which DC like every 5minutes!!!
but it only stable like 3am in the morning!!!?
ohhhh...god. FML..!

been facing sophisticated things lately...
can anyone answer me...why it has to b sophisticated to deal with...??? cant it be easy..!!!
babymatt told me...to fuck the god..cz GOD made things sophisticated!!!
lolx....fucking GOD is a SIN..I wouldnt do tht..:P

whereas on the other hand..
my cells of stupidity arouse again..
wht I did was...controling myself from falling too easily..
the fact is I just dont wanna repeat anything stupid like in the past..
histories are not meant to be repeated!!!
I know how to do when it comes to advice others..but when it was on myself.. I just fuck it with stupidity..@@

What I thought thruly was...."we are just friends."
I dont see theres any chemis between us.....though v can b effing sweet in cyber conversations.
I dont wanna be pushy like other girls...cause I'm different!!!!
If he does wants it, he will definitely COME for it.
maybe I was just one of his preys....
he is such an insecure piece of shit....
anyway...I miss You

here are the Problems with guys:

1. If you don't love him, he'll try to win you. If you love him, he'll leave you.
   

2. If you cheat, u expect it to be over. If he cheats, he expects to be given another chance.
   

3. If you break a promise, you can't be trusted,if he breaks it, he had to. Either way, girls never win.Just face it girls.

conclusion, we girls just have to bear with all this fucking shits...nowonder centuries ago..MEN rules. Wifeys just being pathetics..!! lolx

this is the recent me. sorry for being lost like ages..:P

arghhhhh

line is EFFING lagged for me to blogged.....
gonna update Button soon...I back to home sweet home.


XOXO
lovecyrus.

Things I wanted...

I have been wanting alot of things lately..

tangible and intangible wanted stuffs...
As in How do we get Tangible stuffs...? and the answer is all bout MONEY $$!!
Whereas intangible would be something that you feel with ur heart not something that you feel with ur senses or something that can be seen.

Humans just had not enough of the stuffs around them..though is already alot enough..
hmmm...maybe that all humans are greedy....
like me..i am effingly greedy in everything......but mostly it kenot be food cause I dont wanna be obesse..! haha..^^v

Tangible stuffs I wanted badly..

1. More gorgeous outfits. cz I want to be "dressed to kill" haha..
2. a LG crystal fon..but I already got a BB.
3. a collections OF all sexy colors BRAs..haha. been tempted with triumph newest butterfly bra..lolx
4. an EYE job...effingly sick with my single eyelid eyes..aiks.
5. A vaio netbook.....vaio lappy been not good lately. sobzzz..
6. A set of new bedroom furniture..must b all in white..
7. MORe heels!
   

Actually tangible stuffs was not that I really whine for..I could just get it whenever I wanted to..if thrs $$$$$!!

but actually is all bout intangible stuffs that I really wanted....somehow..is hard to get.
you cant get it with $$..

1. wanted a Cuddle in a cozy night.
2. someone to care when I am down.
3. just wish tht ppl could Only chill with me for sometime but not clubbing.
4. a heart to heart talk!!!!
5. HOnesty..
6. true Love..........
7. someone to miss me often..instead of me missing them.
8. being appreciated by tht someone.
9. having more understanding frens.
10. Fantasies!!..^^
11. wanted a REsponsible yet sourceable grpmate......!!!!!!
12. a SweetHeart.
    
13. a reliable person...i dont wanna b the one to rely on..but relying on someone is NICE.
14. some attention...and everybody will like.."wheres Shan!! how is she?" if iam being MIA..[missing in action] ^^
15. lastly..LESSER annoying people...please.........!!!! life being miserable with them..aihh..

as you can see..I am kind of Demanding girl...
I demand alot of stuffs which...not everyone can fulfill it...
the most I demanded for was HONESTY but..in the world now is everything bout REALITY..
everyday you will just get reality hit....and it make u go like this ".................................."
and I called that Brain Freeze..
but then...being cruel wasnt tht nice..ppl just talk behind ur back..
but what I did was always the best for ALL..not my ownself...........
I hope sem reopens..theres some changes..which I will appreciate it..
last sem still there is disappoinment....
maybe its always beyond my expectations..
I will try not to be cruel...................................but please be Gan Jeong with the works..
I dont wanna b bad..and I will be nice. lovelove.

Lovelove.

Sorry people..been lazy lately and oso busy..
from the first day Came back to IPoh...I already went to party all night..
Next day...slept till noon...n then was relaxing...heheh
and at nite I need to attend my forever responsible Fren..Johnson it was a mini celebration for his birthday in Kampar.
and I drove all the way to Kampar...aiks..*dangerous* lolx.
then...came back n slept till the next noon again..
awwww...the nights continues..
A fren dated me, cause he had not date me before since v chatted few years back.lolx.
went out again.....
Daddy was nagging... I gotta feeling that I will b grounded. hahahahaha
but no la.
Sat and Sun...was being a good girl. hehehehehe...nvr go out. lolx..
but bored me till death leh....ish~~~!

anyway here are some pichas..

Four More Days.

Four more days to live???????????????? lolx....

Been Freaking Lazy plus Hectic week of munching Notes...>"<
its only 3 freaking papers but..........
I still feel like in the long sem of 6 effing subjs to sit for... Uugghhhhhhhhhh......

Here I present you.. 20 effing things I did at the moments of munching notes.

1. I mirror myself like 84567654times a day!!! thats lot..!! @@
2. I peel off dead skins on my precious face...it was Freaking eFFing dry...mom where are your herbal teas????
3. 500 to 700 skippings a day.. thats a must.
4. A moment of black out..dreaming looking at mini spiders crawling here n thr. Ewww...
5. Doll up myself just for camwhore...! lolx..thts bimbotic..
6. Other than munching note..I munch the whole big pack of Munchies Crunchy Oats Choco in two weeks...lolx.. wasted in doing skippings. ><"
7. Having fashion show in my Room..trying out mix n match clothes to wear to exam.. that is so bimbo man.....wtf.
   
8. Painting Nails...*is a must..* hahaha..
9. U-zapping with Osim........bergegar sambil belajar..lolx
10. Talk to myself....*scary huh..*
11. Forcing ownself to sleep even I cnt sleep..Noted:*its in the afternoon k*
12. Wondering all day...what I should shop..but not What I should Study.. T__T
13. Keep on Viewing on facebook eventhough everyone is busying studying.. and thr's no UPDATEs at all...
14. Keep changing Fb's Profile pic..but no one commented on it..sobz.
15. Updated BANYAK status with Questions..no RESPONse oso...
16. Viewed..Nobody by Wonder Girls MV..trying on the steps of the SExay dance..ahahahahha guess wht. failed...! as I am not a Natural born dancer. *blush*
17. Flirting on the internet trying to get a handsome dude..hahaha as wht kennysia says his previous Expiry-ss were from the internet..! wheres mine nw????????
18. Inhaling TigerBalm like nobody's business..[if mom knws bout it..she will think I sdg Drug-ing..!!!] ><"
19. Played Sudoku..which is in my BB..! I do have one in Book type..but devices are better. ^^v
    
20. Lastly....... Called Mom just to tell her...What I want to buy once I reached home! Mom says...you byk masa arrr..? study still tinking of shopping.! sorry mom..but studying always reminds me of what to buy..ahahaha..

Thats ridiculously Wasting time...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thats Why I am so Fuckup with my E-Commerce paper today..! >"<

AND number 2ne1 : I browse thru pichas in my Album and find some freaking ugly picha to PS.

arghhhhh...you can see how ridiculous me of fully utilizing THE precious time that is Meant for study...

Oh..nowonder God dont even bless me d. T__T I am sorry..
What I read doesnt came out..What I planned..aiks.. Is what I did Skipped..came out.


Ok I guess I need to get my ass back to study..or can I sleep..?
Pengajian Malaysia paper due on Mon!! hmmmm...I have not more than 48hours only.
Ohhhh....but MrZhao's son dated me for Hi-Tea..

XOXO Cyrus.

Surviving

Been real hectic these few days..
Skipping classes...
Facing walls dreaming...
Wondering why can a person like me...stuck here. she shud be rotting with baby.
But......baby is busy with her.......!! which I might not have the priority..

life's been DRamaless...and how could this survive me??
Lock myself in the room...just to finish the upcoming presentation due this friday.
AND..another presentation due this friday too..

AND.......midterm on thursday[5/11]
and........International Marketing presentation on Friday same goes to Ecommerce presentation.
ANDddd.....Ecommerce midterm on Saturday[7/11]
MOREover....Ecommerce official Assignment due on Tuesday [10/11]

Ohhhh...GOD! spare us more time please...><"
Few days Back...there is this news toking bout 3UTAR students drowned in a waterfall somewhr near Kampar..
One of the student name James..which we do not know each other..drowned.
Somehow..I knew who he was.. I still remember...of all students in the canteen I have stare at. Hes the only one replies me with a welcoming smile.
Thats really kind of him. Fuck la...this is wht we call RESPECT ma. ><" whts with others...with the LCLY I DONT KNOW YOU look!!!!!???
How could such a nice guy..passaway on a young age..??
sometimes..I wonder, things are beyond our control.
May you rest in peace James.

Been wondering lately.... since I just felt that I doesnt seems to be important to anyone.
because....I am not rich, I am not Intelligent, I am not pretty, I am not profitable, I am not those fragile kind of girl which I am on the inside.

or MAYB I just need attention...
how do I get attention?? What if one day...I disappeared from the world.
Will there be people who do not care my existence started missing me?
My mom n dad definitely will miss like hell...lolx.
baby sure will cry like a river...
but...will be those ppl who hate me who do not care my existence who betrayed me whom I do not knw miss my existence?

I do good for ppl..but I just dont feel that wht I did is appreciated.
Why do I need to look so strong infront of ppl??
Thats because I donot wants ppl to get worried of me or...giving them trouble.
MAybe I need to stand on myself..!!
Conclusion...I just need someone stand by my side..
I am sorry that once a while...we need to be selfish. T______T

ACTUALLY....what is life??

All I Have To Give ♥

Another rainy night. ><"
First of all falling in love with you wasn't that Grateful at all.

From the very beginning I said to myself, I would not fall for you. Somehow when days goes on and on......feeling the way you Tad myhead, the hugs we been through and the conversations we been through....Though you seldom response much in the conversation but everyword was like pamperation to me.

Mayb to you it was just Customer Service and I was just a Nagging Client who is not gonna give you any profit which annoys you..

I may sometimes do particular stuffs which is out of control. You got annoyed and pissed and I cried out of nothing. But it is because of I love you that makes me lose control sometimes.

When the time before I got any serious yet, you were so sweet and caring. We mingling around each other and that does not at all bring sadness. Thought through it, I felt it was all my fault who brought things to be serious and make you got what I mean and what you did was........clicked on the reject button and told me that you doesnt mean to hurt me.

Life goes on..... where I built walls around my heart and then you just tremble it all like no one's business.

You joke to me you love me, I was half happy half clueless, cause I knew that wasn't true and I just dont want to know that it wasn't true at all. I dont have the feeling of facing the fact.

But by the time I am not, the Fact just goes right infront of my face and forces me to accept it by poking needles into my heart and tears just rolls down my cheek and days went gloomy. You know that I am such a Fool thats why you were bored and you fool me with that.

If now you fool me with that again, I would just have tell you this "Fuck off mylife!!!! Go get a Fucking life of yours!!!"

You have empty out my love until it's all gone...But my feelings for you still shows. You made me so confuse that I should hate you or miss you? should I slap you or hug you?

Sometimes I just sit by and think of something and all I thought was the soul who has disappeared infront of me, who has lost his way back, who used to be who he is which is not wht he is now.

Above maybe only words, but there are aloads of feelings burried underneath. It is pretty clear that I have already wrote out the reason of loving you til now. Nomatter how much you been hurting me and how many times you been fooling me.

Seeing you been so emo lately makes me felt even worst! I guess you are in the situation I been before. It felt awwful right???

I had always wished...............

1. I wish I could be the one who can cheer you up but that wasnt me.
2. I wish I could give the world to you but mylove is all I have to give ,
3. I wish I was the one you picked but somehow you were the one I chose,
4. I wish you were my hope, yes you are but you always took it back,
5. I wish I could bring you laughter but everytime I tried my best you werent responding and
6. I wish you were all I needed but you are not, I'm not what you want either.

Glanzing at your page everyday, gazing at the profile picture filled with the flawless girl who you love made me felt underrestimated.
And it made me let go off something I wouldnt want to, cause I have learnt that it wasnt meant to be.
Seeing her gorgeous look comparing to myself, I know why I dont even stand the slightest position in your heart.

throught my eyes you really can see how much I love you, adore you, hearts you, need you, and how much you mean to me. ♥

ps: hopefully that you're reading myblog.

Sleepless Night Causes Craze

Hmmm ..due to my previous post, I felt that it gave the very first impression Badly ey!! I guess is due to the sleepless night. I’m a normal human who needs atleast 7hours of sleep per day. Dono why.. I got so Damn Lazy nowadays..>_<” how I wish human does not need sleeps.^^v We definitely will have more time to complete pending tasks!!!

Regarding on the word Pending. Nice to type or say = Pending. As base on Malaysia’s culture = LastMinute!! Are you proud to be a Malaysian?? Hmmmm…I wonder..!

We as Malaysian tend to “berlengah-lengah”! Oops..I accidentally type it in Malay!! SEE!!! It’s a Malay’s culture..we been born in Malaysia and been raised here. So we adapt to the lazyness culture of Malays due to they are the majority ones…huhu^^

But then…we still consume PORK. Haha..i always wonder..why Chinese tend to call Malays..*malai.G* they don’t consume pork either!! Lolx. Cause of not consuming pork?? Then Chinese who don’t eat beef..v call them what leh? Hmmmm….”CinaBU”!! as in Cina+Lembu = CinaBu. Hahahaha…

Perhaps *CinaBukima*! Hahahaha…Oh god..I'm Stepping my own Race..! SEE!! told ya I didnt Sleep for one night.

[maafkan aku ya. Aku hanya melafaskan perasaan aku aje!]

Shit!! This is the second time I’m out of topic leh….i really sucks in Blogging le.. Guide me please….>______<”

I guess mind as well entertain you all with some Baby'sConvo Pichas..^^

Camwhore!!

Congratz..BabyCarmen^^

Congratz MadMattDear! ^^

Congratz BabyPohSim^^

BTW..some of you might be curious bout "LighterBoy" right..^^
haha....I will post abit bout him attaching to everypost. hmm...this is for you to read to find out^^
anyway I just text him "I Miss You MyDearToy"